I write this today as the baby of the house is sleeping, the 2 older kids are at school this morning, the washer is going, dinner is in the crock pot, but the sink still has breakfast dishes.
I’ve learned I need to take my time, to think, to breath, to keep my sanity.
We had our kids young, close together and it was awesome, it was exhausting!
I gave birth to our first child, almost 6 years ago, I was pregnant with our second child at her first birthday. I finally stopped nursing the first one when I pregnant and so sick I didn’t have enough energy to feed 2 babies. When, the second child was born, we had 2 babies! A newborn and a 19 month old. After that craziness, we took a little tiny break and waited until the youngest was 2 before I got pregnant with our 3rd child. The older 2 were potty trained, slept through the night and were acting a little older. Then, we started all over again!!
This was all in the mix of building our house, me having a hundred side jobs, taking care of a very sick grandma, family things, Mark getting a promotion at work with a lot of new responsibilities, me having a lot of health problems, being newlyweds, trying to help at church, and trying (but usually failing) at keeping God at the center of our house.
It was crazy! Some days I thought I would loose my mind before 9 am, I would count down the hours until Mark got home to be my back up. I would do my best to get through the days until bedtime, then get up the next morning and do it all over again! Exhausting!
I have NO REGRETS!
I miss those baby days, the first time I saw my child, when my babies nursed ALL the time, the first time they smiled at me, the little baby grunts all through the night, how they always smelt good, how they snuggled, how they could sleep in my arms, the tiny diapers. Will never forget their first months of life!
I write this post not to complain, not to have a pitty party, but to remember that those first years as an adult, wife, mom were HARD! My posts are mainly for my kids and maybe someday they will feel like I did. Maybe they will be so exhausted someday and need hope. That is what this post is for. To say those 5 years were hard, but we made it! I lived to tell the story! Maybe my kids remember me saying “mommy is going to go crazy” or they can remember when I should have more patience with them. I am human! I have told my kids, husband, parents “sorry” more time than I can count!
I know hard days are not a thing of the past ( I mean, we have 3 kids that will all turn into teens and then adults!), but I know there are so many great days ahead too! I was telling a friend this weekend that I finally feel like we’ve gotten to the point where I can breath again! With the youngest being 15 months now, she sleeps through the night, she is done nursing, she acts more like a toddler now. While she keeps me on my toes and likes to be with me all waking hours of the day she is getting a little more independent.
I can drink my morning coffee with only warming it up a few times and not the 20 times like before, or finding my coffee cup in the microwave at lunch, then finding my lunch in the microwave at dinner (yes, that really happened!) I am learning how to slow down and enjoy my days. Not looking at them as another day to count down the hours!
So, take a deep breath and remember it WILL get better! It will be over before you know it and you will miss those days!
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:12